THE ONE YEAR BRAZILIVERSARY
It's official. Today is the day of my first Braziliversary (term coined by Lindsey of Adventures of a Gringa in Brazil). One year without leaving the country; officially the longest consecutive term spent outside of the USofA. Is Brazil finally my home then? Am i a Paulista? If i'm not i pretend i am anyway. Paulista is a state of mind anyway. you'll agree when you travel state to state in this country, like mini countries thrown inside of one large gunny sack. They say (unaccredited web writers and day-job psychologists) that the first year of marriage is the most difficult. Well forget that, it's the first year of expatriatage that is. It's the marriage that saved the later! Obviously since that is the reason we are here. Either way, one year. So what is the verdict? Acclimated to the climate? Accomplish all my goals? Warm up to the wonderful humans known as Brasileiros/as? Do i do as the Romans and sigh, scratch my head and submit? Do i wear a thong on the beach yet? I've somehow accomplished quite a few things, though it did take a while. My timeline was burned to ashes and my patience exploded around the holidays, but like everything in Brazil, the paperwork took a long time to complete. Yes i have an opinion on Brazil and yes i have an opinion on Brazilians, and no i will not wear a Brazilian bikini. Doesn't America celebrate cultural diversity with a crack melting pot theory? American bikini is my culture,so let me be you xenophobic Brazilians!
After much, or rather little self debate with a trifle facebook poll thrown in over whether to make a cake or pão de queijo for the big day (today) i sided with the cheese as we're already scheduled to produce a cake tomorrow. Why pão de queijo? I've already posted it here at Salty, about three years ago when none of you readers were with us (other than parents and B&J) so i'm posting it again. Hey, you say, don't you also have the same recipe in a certain online compilation cookbook that no one bothered to buy? why yes, yes i do. Accompanied by a dramatic story about Brazil? yes! clever you. Moving on, i have a very personal connection to pão de queijo. yes, i am connected to a cheese bread. a soft, gooey puffy cheese bread. so naturally they are an appropriate first Braziliversary treat even though we make them every week. The first time i made them was while i lived in Paris, i posted them simply to surprise and prove to a Brazilian friend of mine that yes i was listening to the 2:00am skype conversation on biscuits and Brazilian pastries...time zones. First physical proof of my cross-continent stalking (what?) abilities. Long story short, the first time i arrived in Sao Paulo, that friend picked me up from the airport and gave me a small packet of pães de queijo. Delirious from the 19 hour plane ride i let them go cold. yes i was scolded for it. Then, the first time said friend came to the US, i made homemade pão de queijo to hand him at the airport. Then when i cam back to Brazil....you get the picture. oh ps my friend and i got married, our love of cheese breads was too great a bond to be separately.
Another reason to post is that i am quite put off by all the "recipes" for pão de queijo i come across in foodgawker. Random recipes (by Americans, Australians, Koreans, whohaveyou) that don't even mention that they are Brazilian, and worse, recipes with wheat or corn flour mixed in, and some made into a liquidous soup in a blender, gah! what blasphemy is this? these people should be ashamed of themselves. But hey, you might say, you are no Mineira, you should shut your mouth. touché. but my buns have already been Mineiro-approved so drop your nose. Yet one more reason to post about pdq is that my father discovered them at a churrascaria in Seattle and had lovely dreams about them. Unfortunately, the ones he had were not the best. The best in the world are the ones at the Rodaviaria (central bus station) in Indaiatuba. true story. my homemade recipe comes in close after. But if you truly want the best pão de queijo, you suckas have to come to Brazil.
Recipe
ingredients: 2 cups (about 250g) polvilho (cassava flour), 1/2 cup milk, 1/2 cup water, 1/4 cup oil, 1 tsp salt, 1 egg, cheese. try for roughly 25g cheese. you can use a mixture of any variety, even farm cheese.
method: Bring water, milk, oil and salt to a boil. Let cool slightly.
Add the flour and stir, it will be hot and it will be ugly.
Add the cheese (about 1/2 cup cheese, Parmesan, Provolone, mozzarella, whatever you have) and combine as best you can.
Add the egg and kneed with your hands (if not too hot) until a smooth dough is formed.
Coat hands in olive oil and roll the whole dough ball in your hands. Roll small dough balls and place either in a cupcake tin or on a parchment lined tray.
Bake for about 30 minutes at 325. Do not let the bottoms burn. The insides should be gooey but not taste like raw dough.
*if you are in the US, don't buy tapioca starch. it is not the same. it won't taste the same and the texture will be much different. look for a South American imports store or a Brazilian store (there is a shop in the U district in Seattle that sells polvilho) and look for cassava flour.
*once you're a cheese bread making master, addvariety to your buns with chopped herbs, shredded chicken, diced salami, fresh cracked pepper and even apples.
The language. So after one year with zero lesson i somehow find myself able to classify myself as a Portuguese speaker. Sure i sound like an uneducated immigrant, but i am understood and once i have a caipirinha there is no shutting me up. The Portuguese just rambles out like a falling bowl of jello. Usually there are about eight percent French words accidentally added, but who is counting. I can't write worth beans (or rice, ha!) and i am reminded of that daily, particularly when facebook "chatting" with the ten year old cousin who lives down the street. It's da, you said de, that doesn't make sense. Thank you sensei, i will try harder next time. Brazilians "type laugh" by repeating the letter "K," that has never made sense to me. K doesn't even technically exist in the Portuguese alphabet. Anyway, i know it will take many more years before i am through with the offensive mistakes, and perhaps a class on how to write. But that's ok. i leernedd how to speaky yous guys, i speaky!
So Brazil... i would like to post an essay of thoughts and analysis on the ever present question,"so what do you think of Brazil?" This may take a while and if you are Brazilian, you might possibly misunderstand my view point in showing both the positive and negative aspects that stand out to me. I believe that in order to really get to know and live with someone you lave to be aware of their assets and faults and be able to either get past them or mindfully hope that it will get better and adjust your actions accordingly. A country is no different. I love Brazil, and if I still cannot prove that to you, then crawl into your crab cake with cheese and continue to label me as a misinformed hater. If you prefer not to read, scroll past the small text to the end.
The country. So how do you like Brazil? is the absolute most difficult, annoying and commonly posed question i receive. how do i like Brazil. Like every place on the planet, other than Scandinavia of course, there are things to love, things to like, things to dislike and things to hate. Let us say, as a blanket statement, that i love Brazil. Yes, i have grown to love Brazil, even though there are many things i am uncomfortable with. Brazil has a spirit, a history, a sky, a sunset, a sound, a smell, a laugh and a taste that i will never shake a desire for. I truly am happy to call this place my home and to have a loving Brazilian family all around. But the things in Brazil that i cannot let go are the great divisions between the poor and the wealthy, education, role of women and the never ending submission to the nonsensical (such as psychology exams for driver's license or three separate treasure-hunt stations to make one single purchase at a store or shop.) I get extremely flustered by the nonsensical and realize how easy many things are in the US, like going to the DOL and only the DOL to get your driver's license. Unfortunately for now, the only thing to do when faced with the nonsensical in Brazil is to simply breath and go forth with your work. And then rant about it to as many people as will listen.
A foreigner, or Brazilian, could go on for days about the severe lack in the Brazilian education system. Lack of funding in the public schools, government money poured into public colleges so that the rich kids who paid for private high school can go for free, no school buses and the utter disrespect and devaluation of educators. Public schools have no money, so their teachers get paid no money. Perhaps that makes sense even though it is not just. Private schools pay educators better. But then there are the private language schools. Private, corporate language schools. The teachers at such establishments make less than a middle-school dropout barber. Brazil, in my view as it stands, fails the majority of its people when it comes to education. And lack of education is, well, the root of all evil.
In concerns to women, many Brazilians (especially women) may be scratching their heads wondering how i could possibly find the role of women degrading here. Well i do. As an outsider, i do. I was beyond proud when the nation elected Dilma Roussef as the first female president of Brazil. But at the same time, the role and image of women in this country leaves me shaking my head. A short list: high heels, enough to permanently damage your feet for life. Hundreds and hundreds of reais on beauty and fashion even when the money is not disposable. Obsession with appearance. Obsession with impressing men. Wearing uncomfortably small clothes just to impress men; it's the wrong size, too small! no, it's suppose to look like that. Obsession with "sexy." Constantly judging out of fear of being judged. For a while i would just smile and gawk at the idea of a "beautiful" culture, but then when you think why do they do it when there are so many negatives to it, you start to realize it is for a male pleasing society. Cultural? Your bikini is cultural? Cultural for the past 50 years you mean. Who set the culture? Whose culture are you following? You like it, fine. But for what reasons? After a while, i really fail to see how nail polish is culture.
Above all the superficial "cultural" pressures put on women, the one i cannot forgive is elective cesarean section. Brazil continues to be the nation with the highest (30 percent) rate of c-section births in the world. The vast majority are performed in private hospitals. 70-93 percent of births in private hospitals are c-section. Private meaning money. This, of course is only according the the World Health Organization. Is it yet another way to distinguish the top economic class from the other or is it something else? In studies (conducted by Brazilians) when women are questioned as to why they elected to have a c-section (as in it was not necessary), the answers of avoiding pain and remaining sexually desirable to men were the most common answers (as well as bullying from doctors). The "idea" of the Brazilian woman is fierce, but in reality she is labeled as a visually appealing man-pleaser. The pressure placed on women to be attractive and sexually desirable can even trump reproductive and maternal instincts (for those who choose elective cesarean). Unacceptable and utterly disrespectful to the many women who must undergo a c-section in situations of life and death. Cesarean surgery was created for one reason; to be used in emergency situations.
The funny thing is that i don't feel pressure. That is, aside from the fact that i am put off from the idea of ever having a child in Brazil. But there are many women, particularly where i live, who don't fit the labeling above. I don't wear heels, i wear sandals to the grocery store. I prefer my nails plain and clean. I prefer to leave my ass up to the imagination rather than to the eyes. My husband once said to me that painting my nails would show that i am trying to assimilate into the culture. But why? I am assimilating into Brazil just fine, why are such superficial things like my nails part of culture? Part of the culture of a western powerhouse nation in which many women hold extremely powerful economic and political positions? To be honest, i don't view it as culture at all. It isn't. There are many, many more important, endearing and inspiring things about the Brazilian culture than trying to impress men with an ass propped up with high heels, cheap nail polish and a bare bottom in your face at the beach. Beauty gives women power? Confidence? If you feel so, then fine. Undoubtedly there are women who feed on it. I can't stereotype all Brazilian women to this profile, there are many, many beautiful, intelligent and powerful women who think along the same lines as the words written here.
In one year i have managed to make some amazing friendships, mostly with other expatriates struggling through the same issues as me, but also with some genuine Brazilians both living in and out of the country. Until you move away and start over as a silent nobody, you never really realize how important friendships are. My expat friends, who many i have never met (yet) are like an extended family, and my Brazilian friends are as wonderful of people as can be. But then there are others. I, like everyone, have an opinion on everything, an opinion that not everyone agrees on. There are many people who read this blog and dislike what i have to say. Though the negatives, or rather neutrals concerning my time in Brazil have been extremely few (maybe one? two negative posts in a year? sometimes not even negative at all, but simply a misunderstanding) i continue to receive oddly large amounts of criticism, from Brazilians. But, oh well. I will keep on anyway. There are hundreds of ways to positively describe Brazilians in general; proud, self-sufficient, humble, generally happy with life, faithful, hard-working, real, positive, gracious, conscious and patient. very patient. i wish i could be as patient as a Brazilian. On the other side, Brazilians in general are also oversensitive, submissive, unquestioning, sexist, divided, reckless (in terms of driving), undereducated and oversensitive, oh wait, did i already say that? This is, of course, merely my generalization, feel free to disagree.
So after this brief (Shakespeare brief) view on the shortcomings of Brazil, you would expect me to remark that all Brazilians are asses. No, i don't think that at all. There is a song i like to hear on the radio, when i finally translated it i said to myself all Brazilians are butts? The real translation is neither are all Brazilians (women, but i take is as Brazilians in general) asses. And i realized you could insert the word American in for Brazilian and the song would still make sense. There are many things i dislike about America and Americans, but there are more things to like. I'm still American and still love my country, not all Americans are asses. It's the same thing with Brazil. Adjusting to life in a new country means accepting that. Brazil is only part ass, and i love it for what it is, even with the ass parts. It is possible to cope, even with a laundry list of disagreeable aspects, if you are willing to cope. Somehow i've managed to feel at home here, even welcomed. So i am grateful to Brazil for that.
Here is to a fast, furious and fabulous first year! It only gets better from here on out. There is so much of Brazil to see. While driving from SP to Belo Horizonte a few weeks ago (7 hour drive) i realized how utterly beautiful this country (well, at least Minas Gerais) is to drive through. If driving on Fernão Dias wasn't a constant truck-dash to escape imminent death, it would be quite relaxing. We'll be traveling to the north in a few weeks and i've come to realize that i have already physically experienced more variety of Brazil than i have of the US. Traveling through Brazil is like crossing ten European borders, there is so much diversity and change from one region to another that i really don't think that i will ever run out of new and exciting destinations in Brazil to experience. Digressing, for now---Rainbow caipirinhas tonight!
Before any Italians or Italian food lovers scream hey, that's not grape schiacciata! let me assure you that i know. It's a first cousin of the bread and is gluten free, made with a hell of a lot less dough, is actually a "flat" bread, and has a bit of parmesan cheese sprinkled on. It's my interpretation of the classic baked good that i had never even heard of until last night while sitting in my bed reading my 
And now we can talk about the bread...i never seem to be able to talk about simply one thing at a time. Last weekend i held Portuguese conversation two days straight, and even when i'm speaking in Portguese my mind wanders to a new subject abstractly. Out at dinner a friend asks, why are you all of a sudden talking about shoes? i blink, oh, i have no idea. I am no longer afraid to make mistakes, i actually like the mistakes. Calling a lawyer a pineapple to his face is one that will go in my book of oh look, remember when... The schiacciata, undoubtedly one of the most difficult things to pronounce, is made from my basic pizza dough that consisits of yeast, water, tapioca flour, rice flour, baking powder, olive oil, egg and salt. Traditional schiacciata consists of one layer of pizza dough covered in grapes and oil followed by another layer of pizza dough covered in grapes. So a pizza dough grape sandwich. My pizza dough is not chewy like wheat dough, it's not too crisp, but not bready. It's hard to describe, but either way it is much too dense to layer on top of itself. That would be quite a mouth full. So the first alteration is to use a single flat layer of pizza dough. On top of the dough goes a layer of olive oil followed by anise seeds followed by a small sprinkling of parmesan cheese to contrast the sweetness. I read many reports on traditional schiacciata being a very sweet bread, and not everyone's cup of tea. Salty sweet is in this season anyways. Bake 20 minutes on the pizza stone and delissimo!
Moving on to these cookies. Surprise! A baby! Not my baby, but yet another cousin who is most likely going to be the last cousin born because the oldest of the cousins are already starting to have their own babies. He is the sixth child of one of the uncle families and is joining three brothers and two sisters. Being the sixth child born generally isn't anything special in a family that has so many kids and babies that there still are a few who's names i don't know. But regardless of number, a sixth baby is as fun as a first baby. I have five siblings as well, and when the sixth baby was born in my family, it was just as exciting as the fifth and fourth. Can't really remember the others...So to welcome the new baby we made teeny tiny baby blue cookies as well as green turtles. Why? Mainly because royal icing sugar cookies don't exist in Brazil so they are "new" and "exciting," i prefer homemade gifts, and i am certain that when the baby comes the "party" will be the usual meat and beer. So cookies are absolutely necessary.
